It was during the Christmas season when I experienced the pain of Losing a loved one. The person was one of my best friends. He had struggled with alcoholism for many years. There had been several times through the years when he had fallen into such a deep depression that he would start talking about how life was not worth living. If I was aware of what was happening with him, I would hold him up during those drunken times of depression.
Through several changes in my life, I stopped interacting with him. I actually moved across town and very seldom saw him anymore. He was the type of friend that you have for life. His was just shortened because of a moment in the night when he was alone with a rope and a tree.
I got the call from a relative that he had done the very thing he had been threatening to do for a long time.
If you know someone like this, please don’t just blow them off. If you cannot help them, it will be beneficial for you to know deep down that you had tried to help in many ways. My first reaction was being upset and my second was a sense of peace inside knowing that I had pointed him toward AA meetings on several occasions. Even better than that I had lived a life of sobriety in front of him.
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Losing him to alcoholism was hard for me to deal with. Fortunately for me, at the time I had about five years of attending support group meetings for people dealing with alcoholics. I was able to be strong in the middle of experiencing a great loss, one of my best friends. I had also stayed sober for ten years in the Alcoholics Anonymous program. Between having the education of both programs, I was able to deal with his choice to end his own life.
The only person I have an control over is me.
Now he had a best friend that he could not stop hanging out with on a daily basis, Budweiser. I had done all that I knew to do to point him in the right direction. He refused to end his relationship with the alcohol. It was a daily romance that he was involved with that eventually took him down so low he could not get up.
I have wondered on many occasions, what really happened that night? Why did he finally decide to go through with what he had threatened to do for so many years? For some people there’s an element of metal illness, but the truth about alcohol is that it’s cunning, baffling and powerful.
You know, I had tried to talk sense with him many times while he was sober and at times when he was not. There was a very hopeful period that he went through in his life where I thought that he would get well. Obviously, he did not.
The disease of alcoholism is cunning, baffling and powerful. It is no respecter of persons.
If you are dealing with someone who is suffering from drinking too much and you believe they are a threat to themselves, do something about it. Find a support group meetings or get involved with an organization who can give you WISE counsel. It is possible to have them Baker acted or you can do a family intervention. You must get connected with people who can help you deal with this situation.
You do not have any control over the alcoholic’ choices, but you can get help for yourself by attending Al-anon meetings. Losing a person to this horrible addiction is tough whether they are alive or not. Take care of yourself by surrounding yourself with people who know how to cope with alcoholics in their lives. The more you learn about how an alcoholic thinks and acts, the better you will be able to deal with stressful situations.
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