I’ll never forget how embarrassing it would be to bring my friends home after my mother had been drinking. After she gets drunk, it’s just too much to deal with when my friends come over.
I felt like a prisoner because when I would be at home, I’d always hide out in my room. I actually hated it whenever she would get drunk. I’d come home from school never knowing what to expect. She never had to work a day in here life. So, she was always free to be at the house all day long. This is where she did all of her alcohol consumption. As I think back it was a good thing because she was not out at bars.
I know the pain that is associated with a mother who gets drunk all the time. It is so frustrating. If I may, let me offer a couple of suggestions that may help you to not get so irritated when she has had too much to drink.
What can I do?
Try a few of these suggestions; they will help you deal with your mother’s drinking problem:
1) Understand that your mother does not want to be the way that she is right now. Alcoholism is a very serious illness; it’s very much like catching a horrible cold that you cannot get rid of. I know you are thinking that she could quit drinking if she wanted too. Your right, but at the moment she is addicted and is going to need help.
2) Make a decision right now to not fight with her about her alcoholism. I have a question for you. Would you argue with a friend or even your mom if they had just gotten out of surgery and were under the affects of an anesthetic? Of course not! She would not understand anything that you are talking about. The same thing is true when someone is abusing alcohol. The abuser cannot understand or even begin to comprehend what you are arguing about.
3) Talk to a close friend about what is happening at home.
4) Find an Al-anon or Ala-teen program. This is a place where people can help you. Do it today, even right now! Go to the phone book and look it up and call right now and talk to someone about what is going on.
5) Find an older person in your family who will take you to an Al-anon meeting. I promise that if you will go to some of the meetings, you will meet many people just like you who are dealing with mothers drinking too much booze, children who are addicted and close friends, and relatives that are addicted to alcohol. They will help you; I promise, if you let them.
We have tons of information on this website that can help you stop arguing with an alcoholic. You can learn how to control your temper and also why it is so important to try to not confront your mom when she has been drinking.
Check out these articles:
Why Can’t An Alcoholic Just Stop Drinking-This will help you understand what having a bad habit is like. It’s not that they don’t want to stop drinking. It is usually because the are physically and mentally addicted to the substance.
Tips For Parents Drinking Alcohol-This will help you understand that your mom’s addiction is not your fault. You will learn the importance of sharing your feelings with others and how to protect yourself from violent outbursts.
What To Do About Alcoholic Parents-You will learn that fighting with an alcoholic accomplishes nothing along with more encouragement to ask for help.
I know it is so frustrating when mothers get drunk. It took my mom eleven years to finally get sober. She did quit drinking. So, do not lose hope. Actually, she was able to stay sober for twenty five years afterward. Yes, I was very proud of her and everyone in the family was extremely happy that she was able to get her act together.
She did this with help from God and the AA program. If you ask God to help you deal with your mother’s alcoholism, I promise he will. You must do this believing that he hears you. Ask the Lord with a very sincere heart to help your mom and your family. Get on your knees and cry out to him. Then be patient, he can make amazing things happen in your life and in your moms. Just trust him.
When my mother was consuming way too much, I stayed at my older sister’s house often. She would come and pick me up and have me stay with her. I’ll never forget, when I would call her up and tell her that mom was drinking again, how quickly she would come to get me.
I had now idea what to do then, but I know what you can do now. Get on the phone and call Al-anon and talk to someone about what’s happening with your mother drinking too much alcohol.
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