Why must they be so selfish? Is this behavior common among most alcoholics? Is getting drunk more important than anything or anyone to them? Do they really want to be so selfish or is it just because they are addicted to a substance?
For many of us these questions probably have a few curse words mixed in with the sentences because we are so angry with the problem drinker in our lives.
We grit our teeth, kick the tree, slam the car door and the phone when we are mad at them. Sometimes we even throw the phone or whatever we have in our hand at the moment the alcoholic acts so self-centered.
Understanding why an alcoholic lies, why they stand us up and why a drink is more important than the family plans, may be impossible. Your answers will be found in acceptance.
Let me turn this in a different direction.
If you can understand why your alcoholic spouse, child, parent, friend or co-worker is so selfish, will it make a hill of beans of a difference?
Do you think for a moment that by understanding why they treat the dog better than they treat you that this will make them quit drinking?
If you can figure out what makes them act this way will you feel more loved by them?
By chance, will you be more at peace if you can get the satisfaction of knowing what is really making them act this way?
Let me make this really simple to understand.
Alcoholics are just selfish, now read on…In AA, it’s said that alcoholism is cunning baffling and powerful.
They are addicted to a substance that has commandeered their minds. That’s why many alcoholics drink in the morning. All they can think about is where they will get the next drink from. It’s a physical craving that the mind will not let loose of. If you’ve ever wondered what goes on in the mind of an addict, it’s a constant obsession to get the next drink.
Now, with that being said, you should have an understanding of why an alcoholic is so selfish.
Your only option is to accept the fact that this is an attribute of the personality of alcoholism. Once you have an understanding that nothing you say or do is going to change their selfishness, the less expectations you will have.
Here’s how it works!
When we stop expecting the alcoholic to act a certain way that they are not capable of doing because of their constant obsession to get a drink, we will have less disappointments and resentments to deal with. Stop fighting a battle that you will never win and just accept that a drink of alcohol is more important to an alcoholic than their business, children, husband, wife or job.