Guest Post By Mr. B:
Hi everyone, I have a burning question regarding alcoholism and sex drive. My wife is a late stage alcoholic, meaning she has been at this for 30 years or so . She started at a young age. When we were dating she talked about all the great sex we would have once we get married- she professed to be a Christian and that she was waiting for marriage because sex has destroyed all her other relationships. Once we got married, there was absolutely NO sex, NO intimacy.
She is a beautiful woman and I have always been very handsome from what I have been told. Nonetheless, once we were married, she would push me away and make statements like “I have been with so many guys, I’ve already done everything… it’s not you it’s me.”
I’ve been researching and it seems like alcoholism, especially late stage alcoholism, can severely effect sex drive, and I think this is the heart of the matter. It seems like from my readings that these people can only get excited by bizarre behavior like stranger sex or making out in restaurants etc…. I am beginning to see that the only true statement she made was “it’s not you, it’s me.”
She has had many long term partners cheat on her and it’s the same reason with all of them, “he did it because I wouldn’t sleep with him… gross, I wasn’t attracted to him”.
So has anyone else had problems with sexual intimacy with the alcoholic?
At this point, it doesn’t even matter, as I am not attracted to her any longer and I am working my plans for divorce. Nonetheless, I still need validation that I am indeed not the problem.