Millions suffer from anxiety because they are living with an alcoholic spouse, mother, father, brother, sister or teenager. This is by far one of the biggest subjects related to alcoholism that I can think of. Here are a few steps for overcoming this troubling emotion that affects us on a daily basis.
It’s OK to not go home
This is something that took me a while to learn. If I was not mentally prepared to go home to the unexpected because there was a restless feeling on the inside of me, I had to learn to ride around the block a few times. We must learn to recognize when something is bothering us and get control of our emotions before walking into the atmosphere where the alcoholic in our lives lives. By getting a handle on things prior to walking in the door, we can better handle what is going to happen on the other side of the door.
Living a more serene life
As we begin to attend support group meetings that help us get more peace in our lives, when the calm is disrupted we begin to notice it right away. Because of this recognition, we then are able to focus on ourselves and work at getting rid of the anxiety related to living with an alcoholic. Before learning how to get serenity, we had no idea what peace was like because we were always fighting and arguing with the problem drinker.
Just go to sleep-a key to overcoming anxiety
I learned early on from a good friend in the Al-anon program that I should just go to sleep when the alcoholic refuses to come home and wants to stay out drinking. This tremendously helped me to not lose my cool due to lack of sleep. Even though at times it was extremely difficult to do, the more I practiced just getting in bed, instead of pacing the floor, the better I got at falling asleep. When we lose sleep we then become vulnerable to experience all sorts of negative emotions. Anger and anxiety go hand in hand with families who are dealing with an active alcoholic.
If you are living with an alcoholic, then it’s for certain that you are dealing with anxiety. If we can stay present in today, avoid the future and forget about the past, we are better able to maintain a certain level of serenity. This is another way of overcoming anxiety. Just to know that today I have everything that I need, sometimes is all I need to help me keep my cool and not lash out at the alcoholic in the family.
I have been reading and reading and everything i recognize.
Living with an addicted mind, although not violent, but mind raping is very hard.
But also give me an opportunity to work at myself.
To be a tough love is what i need to learn to express my boundries…..gain self respect!!
I get that acke in my stomach and can’t concentrate. My dear husband is so sweet and giving and caring. He drinks all the time as much and as fast as he can. He’s a classic case of denial. I really don’t think he understands how hard it is for me or anyone to be around him. He loves being around me and insists we hang together till he demands food and passes out. I’m relieved and get better when he does. how can I relax and accept this without the anxiety and light headed feeling? I can leave him if I want I got a job and cr. I’m not stuck. So why am I so anxious? Is it because I know that I should exit our relationship and build a more peaceful life for myself. He’s so good to me in every other way…when I put up a fuss and start staying away and ignoring him he stops drinking for a few weeks or months. But he always goes back. The worst part is we can’t really go anywhere not even out to eat. He drinks behind my back and is wasted on the drive to wherever we’ go. Only close couple friends understand. He’s so spacy and weird everything is ok if I baby him but if I don’t he’s totally obnoxious. What can I do on a typical drunk day so I don’t get anxiety? I know this is stressful and sad but I know it already and don’t understand why I’m still so anxious about his behavior.
I told my husband that he causes me anxiety attacks when he is drunk which is almost every nite.I told him I could not be around him for very long when he was drunk
My husband really doesn’t understand or I feel like he doesn’t care! Alcohol is what he cares about!
What can Ido? I take lorazepam for anxiety but I don’t like to take it all the time!