There are at least three ways to over come focusing on the alcoholic in your life. If you are anything like me, I was constantly wondering what the addict in my life either was doing or going to be doing. In such an overwhelming way, my thoughts were centered around whether they would be drinking or not consciously and subconsciously.
Focusing on another’s behaviors will rob us of enjoying our own lives. The momentum we gain when our goals and visions are being worked on is life altering for us and the lives that we interact with in our occupation or family. When we are dealing with an alcoholic and our focus gets off of our goals and dreams, we literally are robbed of the life we were intended to live.
If you are reading this now, there is a better way to live rather than always being worried about what the alcohol addicted friend or relative in your life is doing. The better way is going to require that you change the things you are focusing on. Stop focusing on the alcoholic in your life all of the time. Letting go of an alcoholic can be done, you just need to get the right help so you can do this.
Steps to stop constantly focusing on the alcoholic friend or relative:
1) Get involved in support group meetings-This is a must because there are people who have learned how to live in the midst of active drug addiction and alcoholism without focusing a lot of attention on their loved one or friend.
2) Start doing things that you enjoy-While interacting with others in the group meetings you will begin to establish relationships (new friends). You can then go to the movies, take walks, go to plays, watch sports together and begin to enjoy your life again without being obsessed with an alcoholic’s behavior.
3) Make a decision to stop analyzing the problem drinker-This may be one of the hardest things to do, but we must learn to stop trying to figure out if they have been drinking alcohol or are planning on doing this. Learn to read books when they are around, watch TV, work in the garden or whatever you like to do that will help you to not waist your emotions on trying to figure out what the problem drinker is up to or has been up to.
In my experience, the quickest way I learned how to stop focusing on the addict, problem drinker/alcoholic in my life happened by attending Al anon meetings on a regular basis. It was in those meetings and still is where I obtained the necessary tools and learned how to use them so that I could overcome my problem of constantly focusing my attention on the alcoholic’s behavior. The obsession over an alcoholic that goes along with this horrible disease is just too much for us to handle on our own. Literally decades of wisdom, passed down through generations of people who have attended Al anon support group meetings is available to you if you just pick up the phone and find out where the next meeting place is that you can attend. Trust me, if you do this and stick with it, your life will change for the better.