Ironically enough, I’m submitting this entry right before my first Al-anon meeting tomorrow morning. I have had all I can take from my mother who has been an alcoholic even before I was born, or so I’m told. I have to point out that I am now a 29 year old adult in a healthy marriage with 2 children whom are 4 1/2 and 2 years old. Her drinking has gotten worse over the years and she also suffers from depression. She recently has gotten out of control, lying more, drinking more, driving drunk, saying horrible things around my children. I wrote her a letter about a week ago and only tonight I confronted her about it. I asked her if she got my letter, and she said yes but she didn’t want to talk about it because it was all lies, that I was a liar. I don’t know what I am supposed to do from this point on. She hung up on me and said ” I am not talking to you anymore” So does this mean I wait for her to call again? I cannot have her destructive lifestyle in mine or my families life any longer. But at the same time I feel sad because I feel like by writing this letter to her and getting her so mad at me I feel like I have cut her off and I’ve done something wrong. I felt devastated after she hung up on me, and telling me I’m lying. I wouldn’t lie about a thing, what do I have to gain from it? I’m not trying to hurt her I’m trying to help her…..
JC: Thanks for sharing your story. One of the things that came to mind is how alcoholics are good at turning the focus away from them onto us. It’s common for alcoholics to blame us for things that are not our fault. I’m sure that for many years you have battled with trying to NOT let your mother’s drinking problem consume your life. Al-anon will teach you how to overcome focusing on the alcoholic and how to enjoy your family without all of the drama that is associated with interacting with your mother.
Feel free to offer your experience, strength and hope in the comments section below.